Thursday, June 11, 2009

The First Graduation

So, he graduated.
At long last, the most signifigant milestone in his life(at least for me) has been achieved!
After many years of blood , sweat & baby is finally growing up.
The ceremony was a bit uncomfortable. The rows of seating consisted of too closely placed together plastic folding chairs(the kind you couldnt stand on to take pictures) . And unless you got there an hour before almost everyone , you got stuck too far away to get any decent pictures, especially since the seats were all at ground level. The one plus was that there were 2 big screens on either side of the stage showing the speakers and then the receipt of diplomas. All told, we were there 3 hours, and only one decent picture . This i took afterwards, while he was walking out.
The one complaint i have to launch at this point is that i was unable to enjoy the milestone fully, and as a true parent should because on one side of me was my mom(whispering a few family tales) and on the other was my husband and daughter( cracking jokes about how my sons father had body odor). Each time i started to reminisce or get a little teary eyed remembering something nostalgic, or just the sense of "loss" thoughts were interrupted. And then afterwards , as we all kept getting separated in the crowd on the way out, i was, again unable to allow my son his rite of passage to hang out with some friends chatting & shaking hands, congratulating each other because my entire party buzzed as fast as they could to get to their cars(as if they were glad for it to be over), and i was forced to follow along , leaving my son to have his FATHER drive him home.Of course, no one did any of this on purpose, and i guess it's hard to understand how a mother builds these events up in her mind- but it only happens once!
Over all, it was fine. I was very fortunate that my parents, husband, daughter and my sons father were able to attend. And for this i am grateful.
On another note, i feel it important to note that 2 of my mothers sisters rsvp'd and will definitely be coming to the graduation party! Just when i had given up hope. Praise the Lord, for He always answers my prayers! (this one for my kids sakes!)
Tomorrow is my daughters graduation from her nursing program.I'll post pics then. I will be taking my son & his girlfriend & picking up my mom.I am really hoping this one doesnt last as long since i do have to drop my mom back home and then report to work.I'm really looking forward to passing the torch (the LPN torch) to my daughter, as i step forward into my RN position. This sure has been an interesting & unexpected turn in my life.
Given my background, i would never have thought i would be seeing both my kids graduate high school (on time) myself becoming a nurse, and my daughter following in my footsteps. I also never saw my self continuing on to get my associates degree,being married to such a supportive husband, or living in a beautiful home (much less actually liking my neighbors).
I recall at such milestones , especially with such a unique situation as a trifecta graduation, being on welfare, being with abusive men, living in a one room efficiency, driving beat up cars.I remember not knowing at times if i could feed my kids, pay the electric bill, have heat or hot water, or if my car would make it to work.I remember being on bedrest with my second child and losing everything to bankruptcy.
Life sure can pull some punches.
It is all i can do to hope that i have done the best i could with what i was given, and the choices (sometimes bad) that i made.And even more so- with all my heart- hope that i have been a good parent.

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