Sunday, May 31, 2009

A Pretty Good Day, I say...

Several things on my mind tonight.
But first , an overview of my day. Went to a friends little girls birthday today. She did a pretty good job setting it up & it actaully reminded me of a birthday party my mom set up for my daughter when she was 5, only not as extravagant. They had a pinata, a pool, hula hoops and bubbles.of course there was presents & cake & music. The differences were that there was wine & beer for the parents and also there was a horse for rides and a blow up bouncy thing the kids could climb into & jump around. The home was on a nice property but it wasnt as spacious as my moms.And the theme was horses, not little mermaid.I stayed for about 3 hours then left because i had to work.
Boo. Hiss. I really wanted to stay for the grown up party with the bonfire, frozen drinks & fireworks after the kids left. But such is my life lately. I missed the neighbors Memorial day party since i went on the canoe trip, and we know how that went from my previous post.I am just having a non- satisfying social month . Additionally, i am getting a bit depressed that i really dont seem to have a lot of activity on my Facebook page. Since i've changed my settings, i have noticed that i dont have as many response posts as i thought i did.In contrast, my one friend's page is always hoppin'.Things like this can really get to a person sometimes.
Overall, i know i do have friends, because , otherwise i wouldnt even have events to attend and phone conversations, and emails.But somehow, i just seem to be more lonely than most, or at least i notice my loneliness more. I guess some of us are just more sensitive to that stuff.Funny how i used to just want to be "left alone". Be careful what you wish for i guess.
Of course, there ARE days when i want to be left alone.But not as many as when my kids were smaller....Is this what they mean by "Empty Nest " syndrome!!??When you fell lonely and useless and unwanted? Yikes!
No, i believe, at least in my case, it is all hormone related. Because the reality , the bottom line is, that even as i wish for more friends, i know with absolute certainty that i could not handle it. I am truly such a loner, and an internal person, that too many relationships overwhelm me. In essence, as a friend to many, i would make a very poor freind. As it is now, i dont get to be as good of a friend aas i'd like.
Another thing on my mind this evening is my diet. It has really taken a turn for the worse this past week. It's embarrassing! all the while i pack healthy , nutritious lunches for my daughter & husband, i am snacking on way too many carbs, and (gasp!) meats!i feel like a traitor to myself.
I am fully determined to get back on track Monday. I did make it to the gym 3 times this week. In spite of all the hulabaloo with my son.
The last thing i want to mention is that the first thing i dealt with today was wonderful. My daughter's boyfriend asked me for permission to marry her. I , of course , said yes.I thought it was very sweet of him to ask. We discussed the wedding(the parents will be splitting costs 50/50) and the possible honeymoon places, and the fact that he already has the ring (from Tiffany's , no less!!!) . My husband is being a rat about the whole thing and i've come to the conclusion that when someone is miserable most of the time, they hate to see anyone else be happy. His big beef is that he doesnt think they are ready. Well, she is 24 and has just completed nursing she's old enough & has a good career ahead of her.So does he. And on top of that they are planning a long engagement & to marry next fall.So if it's wrong , they will know by then.He has a great job and seems to be a good provider. We even discussed grandchildren today, and that's another thing. By the time she will have a kid , my daughter wil already be 25 or 26. And that's a good age to start parenting.
Besides, i dont want to be too old to enjoy them!
Ah, well...what does a man know about these things.I'm off to watch a movie now...g'nite!

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