Monday, April 27, 2009

The calendar

And so , i wont tell anyone that i went to cold stone creamery again.
Oh wait! i just did...
oh well....
I spent alot of time enjoying my weekend for a change. The weather was gorgeous and i had a yen for good wine and motorcycle rides. So i indulged in both.Also we finally got our bushes planted.Yeah!
I went to a new farmers market today before church. Not as good as the one i usually go to. Not as much produce, but we are going back next sunday to look for a stone bench for our garden.
I have quite a few things coming up in the next couple of weeks. My sons prom is Saturday the 2nd, so i have to pick up his tux thurs. My husband has a softball game that night also that i'll be attending.Mon, weds & fri are gym nights and tuesday ,of course, is bible study.Sunday i am going to a "purse party".
I start my online course(final graduation requirement) on monday the 4th.Jim's getting his MRI read by the nuerologist next week too.So, hopefully we will have closure on
I have to start planning for our 4 day canoe trip at the end of may. we need a canoe so we will either borrow or rent. I have to get our menu in order and plan the clothing thing. air out the sleeping bags and wet/dry bags.
Next the kids will be graduating June 9th & 11th. My son has practice the saturday before.My graduation is slated for the 26th, but i am planning on a multi-grad party at the end of June. July is my daughters birthday. Somewhere in the midst of this i will be taking the state exams as well.My brother & i are visiting my dad in Va. on Fathers day weekend, and oh yeah! there's Mothers day before that! Hopefully, i can visit my grandmom with my mom after church( i volunteer in the nursery that day).Phew...and i'm not even done yet!
so many, many things...but i'll stop with that and shout a great big CONGRATS TO SANDY!!!!
My good friend & colleague also passed her clinical! and now i can say on here that i was a bit worried because 2 people from the workshop contacted me and didnt pass at one of the hospitals in NY.I wouldnt write it before because that would have been too discouraging if she might have read it .So, there's all the news folks...i'm signing off...have a very sick little girl here tonight- needs closely monitored...Peace!

Friday, April 24, 2009

A Word To the (becoming) Wise

Did you know you can be addicted to anything?Even stuff that's good for you?In studying the Word, i came across much evidence of this .Worry, depression, guilt, our children....In fact, anything we put in our lives which repetitively takes the place of choosing God's Way is a form of addiction (also called idolatry). Sometimes , even things which seem benign, like watching sports , can become a false God. Example, a man spending more time watching sports than with his family, or going to church.
On our way to the gym this evening i was discussing this with my daughter. It came to light in a discussion about the diet that both she & my husband are on at the present. They have both agreed to allow me to govern their intake so that they can lose weight, and hopefully develop healthier eating patterns.
The conversation switched gears when the topic of encouraging her to have a cheat meal every week, so as not to feel deprived. i explained that the reason i wanted her & my husband to do this was because dieting, and losing weight can become an obsession. It can become extreme. A person can become so strict about it that they become enslaved by the discipline itself.And i should know.Up until a few months ago, i had a habit of climbing on my scale everyday to monitor my weight. Keeping it at a certain level had, over the past few years, become an obsession for me.And , as with any addiction, it became destructive and unhealthy. I am happy to say that i now have more peace in my life .
My daughter looked at me funny at first. I had to explain further how this was related to our faith.
I believe that things like exercise, dieting, and even education are all things that can become idolatrous. Especially so because, like myself, so many people believe that since these are good , healthly things that they can never be "bad" for you.And they are---to a point. But as the saying goes -"everything in moderation". When we allow something to become important to us than God, as in becoming something we spend more time with than God, or choose to do instead of(on a regular basis) , say, going to bible study or church or reading the bible , it begins a course towards the ultimate destination of destruction in our lives.
To prove this point, all one needs to do is look at the eating disorders we have(anorexia, bulimia, obesity), the downfall of athletes who take illegal performance drugs,and beautiful minds driven to distraction(winding up in mental institutions)trying to work out new mathematical theories or attempting to become unbeatable at chess. Then there's , of course sex addiction, "regular" masterbation, etc.(and F.Y.I.-Sex is not bad-within the confines of marraige. Outside of that, things get dicey- not matter what society tries to tell you.)
God wants us to love Him the most. And theres truly no such thing as overindulging in Him.We can have all we want. As often as we want. And we wont gain any weight, need rehab, or head to divorce court because of it.
There's something to be said for the wisdom of God.In more ways than we immediately understand. And only by spending time getting to know God do we truly become wise.The more i get to know Him , the more I want of Him. And that's an addiction i can live(and die)with--happily!

Tuesday, April 21, 2009

A New Dawn

I have not been a very faithful blogger lately. I am usure as to why and have a few theories. first, it may be a continued "coming down" from the high of passing my clinicals.Second, it may be this new case i am at- having to leave my house at 9 pm, drive an hour each way, and orienting 3 other nurse to the case. third, i have been really into watching all of my new Joyce Meyer dvds, as well as playing catch up with the Beth Moore study Dvd's.Additionally, there are a few changes at the new case daily-the childs behavior, different approaches to them and requests from the mom.

I believe that it's probably a combination of all these things.

I'd like to insert here that another thing thats been on my mind is that my friend Sandy is taking her clinicals this weekend. I know she's a nervous wreck. I will be praying for her. She is a excellent nurse who deserves to pass this!!!

I do,however have a FunFactor!!! A few says ago i downloaded the entire Best Of Kiss album from iTunes and the other night transferred it to my ipodd, so i was happily listening to it at the gym the other night.Also, just mentioning that the rest of my post just got erased because i was disconnected and i'm really ticked about it.
I had been writing that i may not ever be posting as much as i used to because i am not feeling like i have as much to offer as i used to. Not saying the well has run dry, just that the level is low.
I will be directing most of the content towards those involved in my personal life and stuff like my weekly life, events, emotions, things i'm doing and trying. Just wanted to mention this in case some random reader comes along-please check earlier posts which are directed to a general audience and may be more entertaining or informative.
So, i must go now..God Bless and good night!

Saturday, April 18, 2009

The Serene One

Tonight at the gym i noticed that there are basically three different types of facial expressions people make when they work out. And each person is a different type. I noticed this as i was doing crunches on the ball and happened to look over in the mirror at the two people flanking me, then at myself.These are all looks that one makes while doing the contraction part of an exercise.
1. the person who makes the "happy face "- smiles eerily....only seen a few do this. It's really creepy,but i think it's an involuntary thing. like , that's just how they look when they are concentrating hard.
2. the grimacer- looks to be in agony, almost like they either hate having to do it...or they are putting so much into it i fear they will crap themselves( at that point i move away as soon as possible)
3.the serene- looks as if each exercise is a yoga move and is at peace with the universe. This is me. And i see this very rarely. I started looking for it after i noticed tonight.

I tried to figure out why i have this look, and it came down to vanity.When i smile, my face wrinkles, and i look , i think i just try to smile less to keep my face looking smoother.
Anyway, i do have a few things i wrote down yesterday...

Some new goals
1. pass the state boards by june or july
2.start my container garden( check!-planted seeds today!)
3. maintain the gym thing at 3 x a week.

I will grow in my faith by:

1.watching & listening to more teaching tapes
2.set up # of pages in my study bible to read each morning .to start after bible study ends
3.attend something else at church weekly (besides sunday mornings) to replace ladys bible study.
4. continue to volunteer in the nursery

recipes:all i wrote down was bean burgers , and i actually got one down perfect in one try yesterday. i finished frying them to have them ready today & into the freezer. -ps-used olive oil only sparingly for frying...

So there ya have it so far. Now tomorrow , i am off so my husband & i are going shopping together. this is something we havent done together in a long time.I need jeans & sneakers.Maybe i'll find a few gym clothes, too. I got my Joyce Meyer DVD's in the mail today so i'm gonna get off here & go watch.P.S.#2- the kid is actually sleeping so far tonight! rah rah!!!

Friday, April 17, 2009

ya know..

...i would blog tonight, but i just found out my husband spent over 500.00 on 2 baseball bats. i am without words.however here are some pictures my mom took at the easter dinner i had.the first two are parents, then there's me looking fat in my easter dress!i am so upset at hubs i will not even post his pic!
have a great night!

Thursday, April 16, 2009

Spring Cleaning

Today, i'll be cleaning my house ...and my mind! I'll be writing my thoughts throughout the day(on paper) about things like:

1. new goals for the year
2.ways to save money
3. how to use my time more efficiently
4.ways to be a blessing to others recipes to try
6. growing in my faith

and some other stuff that might come up. Hope to be posting them tonight, depending on how my case goes. I have to work a 10:30-6:30 shift with a little girl who is inconsistent in how much care she needs. Last time she was up all night and very sick,required alot of care. So i'll cross my fingers and think of some Funfactors !


Monday, April 13, 2009

Just Catchin' Up...

We had a wonderful Easter dinner today. It was so amazing that we are still able to gather as a family at times given all of our schedules. The food came out well and the vino was flowing. Afterwards, we got into a discussion about politics, though which almost exploded into a heated arguement. Then that flowed quickly to religion, another area of contreversy. Just goes to proove that these are two things to NEVER bring up if you want things to remain pleasant!
Tomorrow i will be getting back to the gym. The start of a brand new week & i will go 3 times a week now again. i lost so much strength & definition in March from slacking off (due to studying & stress). But now , i'm back in the saddle!
Today's Funfactor: putting away dishes in my newly cleared out cabinets! yes, that's right! i finally got my pantry cabinets installed and moved the food into them! plus i now have laundry room cabinets. It looks beautiful and hides all that crap in the mudroom, and i can once again buy in bulk since there's room for storage!
Also, i get to start thinking about my container garden. I will be doing yellow squash, green peppers, and maybe cherry tomatoes. i don't think i ever want to do more than 3. too much work for a full time employee! i will also be mastering bean sprouts very soon. but thats an indoor thing.Gosh i love Mother Earth News!
tuesday is bible study and wednesday is Bunco this week.I will be going to the gym with my freind on thurs . & friday.Busy,busy, busy!
Soon i'll be studying for boards and will be posting on that a little.But for now i have to wait so i can take my info.lit. online course starting May 4th. It's my last requirement for graduation.If all goes well, i'll graduate June 26th.
My husband & i have decided to go on the yearly canoe trip we used to do but havent for two years. This starts the friday of Memorial day weekend and we get home monday evening. It's officially called the "booze cruise" because basically we just canoe down the river all day drinking beer and camp out over nite on the shore. Very primitive. I'll post on that as well.
Gotta run!

Friday, April 10, 2009

Success...and stress

i have been successful this year, so far. Top of that list of course being able to pass my clinical exam. But i've also had other successes. Back in january, i went on a 3 week fast which eliminated white flour products and meat. Since that time i have decided to reinstate the diet after only a brief 2 weeks. The reason was because, in spite of noticing a drastic decrease in strength and a moderate decrease in energy, i actually felt lighter, and my whole gastrointestinal system functioned exceptionally well.

During this time , i have still eaten the homemade bread from the recipe i mastered (from Motherearth News)but it hasnt really had any negative effects. This week i have eaten chicken breast 3 times. And I have definitely noticed distress in my bowels. So tonight, at my celebratory dinner out, i chose eggplant as my main course, instead of meat.

Next week, after Easter dinner , starting Monday my husband has agreed to go on my diet. This ought to be interesting. He had promised to allow me to choose all of his food, and i reconfirmed that last evening. But tonight, he made a face when i ordered the eggplant, so i said"you better get used to it, this is what you'll be eating" and he says"i dont like that stuff- you gotta make stuff i like"...this bordered on starting another arguement. I mean, what is the point of me trying to help him change the way he eats if i make the stuff he likes? What doesnt he get about that?

Last night we argued about a flippin' shed!
Another thing i have been able to give up is my hair appointments. I am saving lots of money , and my hair will be better for it.

We got back our income tax return and after much deliberation(i use that term lightly- truth is we argued intensly) we decided to spilt the money. My husband , however, to be spiteful decided to use his half to pay bills because i had given him too much grief over blowing a wad of cash on a shed.(2500.00!) so know, i get to have this lorded over me for another year about how "he never gets anything" and "i always say no" and i always"shoot him down" blah, blah, blah!oh well.

I spent part of my share on pantry cabinets and i am pleased as punch with them. its been a long time coming. I also have plans to buy some new sneakers and gym clothes since its been 5-6 years for sneakers and about 4 for the gym stuff. My more -for-less theme here is the fact that buying gym clothes over any other type makes more sense. i wear then to the gym, to work, and even to bed sometimes- plus i wear'em around the it's a no-brainer...a four for the price of one deal.

After we all start eating vegetarian meals, i will be saving more $ on groceries, too. I just cross my fingers hubbs can tolerate it. Although i know i am probably setting myself up for pain and misery,and for taking the blame for all of his misery (again)....

ON A POSITIVE NOTE...I am having easter dinner at my home this year and both of my kids, their signifigant other, my brother, parents and in-laws will be there. Looking forward to family and praising Jesus! He is risen!

Monday, April 6, 2009

Passed the CPNE!!!

It was very hard. I won't lie about that. I studied very hard for 5 months and i still had my heart thudding and my nerves at their breaking point all weekend. I was exhausted after each test point- all 4 labs and 3 pcs's. On friday, i did fail one lab- wound- for letting a string on the gauze accidently touch my shirt.But after 2 successful pcs's saturday, i knew that if i failed the repeat of wound lab, i had failed completely and had to go home. Talk about pressure! But God was glorified through His servant...I was victorious!!!!I spent more time with God this weekend than studying. Through Him, all things are possible.
One thing i will say is, if anyone reads this for CPNE info---Know those critical elements like you know your kids names!When you get your assignments, there's just too much else to think about to not have them down, so make them automatic!
I had two really nice , helpful clinical examiners for the first 2 patients. Then sunday, i had the most stoic, watch-you-like-a-hawk instructor. I knew she would not be giving me any slack . She expected 100% accuracy. Apparently, thats what she got . After maintaining the neutral face and observer role, she came out and actually had a smile :) on her face! She gave me so many compliments, and i felt so good about myself.Totally unexpected . And the relief of it all. I have never cried tears of joy til today. Actual tears!Kind of embarrassing.
But it doesnt matter!I am now a GN! state boards -here I come!RN by summertime- as planned!Wahoo!
Praise God!

Thursday, April 2, 2009

How much can a person take?

After a clash with my nursing agency scheduler yesterday, and going to see my friend with Cancer, i get to my case tonight( a really busy case-stressful in itself) and the mom(the psycho from last year) has a 1& 1/2 note for me with these choice little items:
"please dont use red mouthwash in suction cannisters, only use green"
" please turn (the kids) side to side only, only on back for theravest tx's"(duh!)
" make sure to get all the wrinkles out of the sheet and chux pads below (kid#1)"
" make sure to separate each kids syringes and place them in their places just as i have them now"
"shake excess water from washed syringes"
and on & on & on....
Such B.S.!
First of all, i already do all these things.She even had the nerve to say"make sure (kid#1) isnt wet and bib is dry before leaving". I mean- what the h*ll is she trying to say? i change both kids 15 minutes before i leave.She must be mad if she thinks i am waiting til 7am to change them.If she would get her butt out of bed in the morning to get report, perhaps she would be able to check them right away.
I swear. I knew this was coming. It never lasts very long . It's no wonder she cant keep nursing. I've had to cover shifts here all month because she got rid of the last two .Another nurse who was here quit.
This mom is such a control freak, too. And everytime i start coming back here she's added more crap for the nurses to do.I have decided that since i was told(yes told!) that i HAVE to fill in here since there's no one else, that i am just going to do my thing and maybe she will make me a no -return. That would actually be a relief. And since she always has issues with nurses, no one would question it, and it would save me some aggravation & stress.
On another note, i had a nice time visiting with my freind. She was in good spirits and just had chemo that day, so it wouldnt be til a few days later when she felt bad. She was coherent,and we reminisced about the good ol' high school years!
Also, the countdown continues- i'm off tomorrow night. Then leave Friday afternoon. I return Sunday evening(Got that, secrets?lol!)
If i ever have to do this thing again, i am taking the whole week before off work. It's just too darn stressful.
After bible study last night, i had some peace about it though. We are studying Beth Moore . She says to think of your absolute worst nightmare. Fill in the blanks"if i -------, then i-------.Initially i wrote if i fail, i fail. But upon closer inspection of my heart, i knew that failing this test wasnt the worst thing ever. It would be" If i lost my children, then----. I wanted to write" i would absolutley die, never go out of my house again, just curl up and die" but she said it has to be If---, then--- my God will take care of me".That really put it into perspective
for me.
I felt more peace about my cpne (clinical test) after that.
Okay, well, i probably wont blog til i get back-unless disaster strikes. Pray for me out there!